The dreaded NAME CHANGE

In a perfect world, when you get married your name changes automatically. All of the paperwork is filled out for you.. and all government bows at the feet of the new Mrs. Well.. like I said.. perfect world. If I could go through my entire life without going to the DMV I would do it in a heartbeat. But before you even make it to the place where time stops.. there are 30 other hoops to jump through.. Take this here and get this from here and send it there with this.. blah blah blah. Once you get all the documents, a sense of accomplishment rushes over your body... cha ching! But now it is time for.......................................................................... the DMV.. the one place in the world where you could easily see yourself going to jail for life just to be able to blow that place up.. But regardless of the stink that places puts on your soul.. you are prepared.. you have all documents you need.. from every column and all stamped in the blood of a virgin. You wait in a line longer than that on to Noah's ark.. you are next! "Hi ma'am can I help you?" -says the grim reaper. "Yes, I need to get my name changed on my license, and have everything I am supposed to have." -grouchy Sarah.. "Ok great.. can I see your application?"-grim "Umm... application. dang, don't got that."-aggravated Sarah...  I am then handed this application and sent to the END OF THE LINE! Lord be with me... There was an older man behind me that had it all right.. " My lands aint it a mess how much crap ya gotta bring to dis place to be able to operate a darn car.. I got my birth certificate that is fallin apart a sperm sample a blood sample and my name on this shirt I got on.. So if they gimme any grief Imma gonna go get my dog  and make their day. "- perturbed elder.. He made my visit so much better.. what a funny guy. Anyways.. after another 45 minutes in line, I made it to the front. Turned in all my stuff.. got the worst picture taken of my life and hit the road. So to sum up.. Its a good thing I love my hubster, because the DMV is one place I would rather throw a grenade at then conduct business.
 -Mrs. Roark. :)

Ohhhhhooooohhhhh Listen to the Music.

Ahhhhh music.. the thing that makes the world go round.. the one language everyone can speak.. The connection between cultures.. and the one thing in a marriage that can make you wanna throw grouchy tantrums.. Ok.. so maybe you can answer this.. Who controls the radio? The person driving or the person whos car you are in? Sometimes they are not one in the same.. but everytime, it is a fight.
I loooove country music.. It has always held a small place in my heart.. I like the twang and the easily relatable lyrics.. and of course the guys in tight in jeans.. whoops. ;) I also went through a rap and r&b phase.. I still like some of the artists.. but I don't really listen as much as I did in college.. and then there is my hubster who despises my genres and likes all of the others...... Sometimes it is a true struggle for each of us to deal with the tunes.. He likes the metal.. it makes me wanna jump off of a bridge into boiling lava.. The other stuff isn't as bad.. but I can not HANDLE that yelling music.... I am sure someone that is reading this is getting heated about my pure hatred towards that noise (oopsy) I just cant handle it.. We went to an Iron Maiden and Megadeth concert this summer in Vegas.. he was stoked and I was miserable.. I guess you do anything for love.... However.. even though we have such differences in music.. I will still love him no matter what.. Sometimes in relationships you begin to conform to their likes of certain things.... Fat Chance on this one... But I love him and will cringe and smile every time his man finger touches the radio dial. Pump up the jam pump it up...

Husband is soo Talented..

Growing up I was a pretty creative kid.. I used to make these little clothespin people, "worry dolls." While most kids were playing sports and cheering etc.. I was sitting in the middle of my floor covered in glue, ribbon, clothespins, and of course fake hair. haha. I loved making those little things.. I gave them as gifts for many years.. As I got older.. I started painting, scrapbooking, and any kind of craft I could get my chubby little hands around. I was always the creative kid.. I wish I was more athletic, but the ability to even try was a challenge..
::: OFF SUBJECT::: I played softball for one season,, I was the biggest girl on the team, tall and thick, They begged me to play.. and well I did need to try something other than hot glueing hair to sticks.. So I gave er a try.. needless to say I was TERRIBLE.. our team wasn't that great and I sure didn't improve it any. I got to base one time.. This was because a girl hurt her ankle and I ran for her.. Well then I got out. lol. I caught 1 ball.. I felt like a rockstar. And the last game, I was last to bat.. bases loaded.. we needed 1 run to win. My father was the umpire.. and he struck me out. Awesome.. Ok so moral of this embarrassing story.. Sarah is athletically challenged.
:::BACK ON SUBJECT::: Crafting and Music was my outlet to express myself and succeed.. I guess that I suffered less injury that way.. except for my field commander elbow (for you Ellie) and the feeling that I have lost in my fingers from the hot glue. Anyways, in college I decided to go into Interior Design in order to keep up my art.. After that degree.. I realized.. I will just stick to crafts..
Okay.. so onto the reason why I am telling you all this stuff..... I have found the perfect man.. He is sooooooooo talented.. He has multiple art degrees and is the most talented painter that I know. I am so proud of him everyday for his diligence towards his talent... Being an artist is hard.. He had to get a job to support him.. but he truly loves painting everyday.
When you are in search of a mate.. you never can be sure you will have enough in common to make it last forever.. But I know we got this marriage thing .. I can watch him paint all day, sitting in the corner, with my fingers glued together. Happy crafting!

Check out his Etsy page..
Studs paint..

TV..

The best part about being single is the TOTAL control of your TV and inevitable ability to find the greatest shows known to (wo)man. Once you begin dating someone you try to like everything they like.. For a chick, we start watching the Barrett Jackson Car Auction, tons of endless sports crap, hunting shows, and in my mom's case , The Weather Channel. (don't ask.) Either way.. we start forfeiting our Dance Moms addiction to watch men think that their Matchbox car collection should be in a grownup version. I guess we all think that eventually we will grow to like these things.. Well, for a man, they DO NOT begin watching the things we love. They do not care who gets the rose, if there will be any fights on the Real World, who will win The Voice, which toddler will take the ultimate grand supreme, and of course what Hoda and Kathy Lee have to say about life. Talk about DOUBLE STANDARD! But guess what ladies........ when you get married.. You still care and they still don't! My hubster is pretty good about watching my shows.. on occasion he will do an overly exaggerated inhale and exhale.. usually this is my clue to turn it off of the food network.. however, other times, he will sit through the entire episode of Cupcake wars and even root on a contestant. LOL. These are the times I am excited to watch with him. Now, don't get me wrong.. He really has turned me on to a lot of shows I NEVER would have watched before.. Walking dead, numerous horror flicks, etc. But, I will still stand strong with my picks..
So, my advice.. LISTEN UP LADIES.. Get TIVO when you get married.. Otherwise, you will miss EVERY episode of Project Runway. You have been warned.

Crappin' is Happenin'

There are many times in your marriage that aren't as flashy and fantazmo as the others.. some of these times may be fighting (if that's what you do) others may be running errands as a couple (see previous post) and sometimes your sewage backs up.. CUE THE CRAPPY. When you get married you only see and look forward to the high points.. the date nights, babies, and of course the looooovvveeee... Well all this is great until you have a moment in which you have to turn totally vulnerable and potentially puke in front of the other.. this my friend is when you have a sewer problem..
Last night while doing laundry I noticed a weird/ dog smell coming from where I was standing.. Now unlike Justin I would say this had to be the dogs.. (he would blame me.. yikes tmi) However, I knew different. So I looked around and noticed an issue coming from the floor.. and yes.. this issue needed tissue.. well, it already had it. Barf. So... when hubs got home, I broke the crappy news. He began the 2 day stressing process. He did everything in his power to fix it.. and was even elbow deep in the.. umm.. well... us. I would never have been as strong.. In fact, I almost puked 45 times while being the flashlight holder.. Nevertheless.. IT SUCKED.. He had to use a vacation day,, YIPPEE for him. and I got to endure it all. Lucky Sar. So to do the daily sum up.. Sometimes marriage can be CRAPPY. Enjoy your toilets.

PS: Baracuda by Heart was playing on the radio during the worse of the sewer snaking.. soooo.. as anyone would do in a time like this, I made up a new version.. (if you don't know the song, Youtube it, i'ts a good song.. )   oooooooooooooo smells like poooooopyyyyyy...

Errands

Every person on the planet hates running errands.. Most of the time you have to stop 10 different places.. and are inconvienced at lease twice during the experience.. Well one thing I have learned from marriage is that sometimes it is better to just try to run the errands solo. Men HATE stopping here and there, dealing with people, and they NEVER have the correct things they need to make the trip successful.. Being new to this area I haven't a clue where ANYTHING is.. so running errands is like trying to find a 2 liter of Coke, on the first of the month, at Walmart.. It just doesn't work.. So I have to rely on hubs to take me around in order to accomplish things.. UGggggggg.. One time in my life I wish I did drugs. Sooooo stressful! Everyone hates going to the courthouse to pay taxes etc.. Mainly because you are giving more money to the government and well they are usually not the most pleasant people.. Well after a lot of huffing, puffing, stomping, and yelling, the courthouse experience ended with only a few of HIS tears shed.. ;) The grocery store is a great place for him to realize that ingredients cost more than lean cuisines.. Who would have thought???
Well to sum up, take care of your business when the other is away... this is turn will save your sanity, and you can sneak up to taco bell and cram a burrito down your throat without being judged... You're welcome.

Addictive Personality..

When you get married, you really begin to realize things in your life that may have been a little crazy.. Not just because marriage points these things out.. but your husband will. I begin a lot of my posts/rants with the phrase, "I didn't realize these things about myself buttttt... " Well this is another one of those things.. When I was working at the Marshall Café (one of the best and greatest things I have ever done) I worked with a guy that was cleaning out his movie collection. I never really would watch movies I bought, so I really didn't ever buy any.. You know that you  watch movies on tv, that you had in your movie collection more than you would just pulling it out and watching it on cue....However, I was intrigued by one of his collections.. He had all FRIENDS seasons on dvd.. I knew I always loved the show when it was on tv.. but I had never bought tv show seasons of ANYTHING.. his price was so good I really couldn't resist.. Little did I know, this was going to begin a sickness... Since the day I purchased these dvds (Which I belive to be in 2009ish) I have probably watched the seasons 100 times through.. So, now I am sure you think I am exaggerating.. No my friend... this is not an exaggeration, and I would probably say it has been even more than that. I have become obsessed with the show.. At first I watched it when I was going to bed.. then I started watching through the day.. well then it came to cancelling cable because it was stupid paying for something I wasn't using, because I was watching FRIENDS all the time. Well 5 years later.. Has she changed? Is she sick of the show? Well to answer the questions in one blunt answer, NO!!! I am still so obsessed with it.. I love it.. It is by far the highlight of my day.. (aside from husband time ;) I look forward to being able to watch it everyday. Well, since I began with pointing out the things hubs thinks is weird.. you can use your process of elimination to realize this is the reason.. I am sorry.. I can not help it.. Yes I still laugh.. Yes I wish I was on the show.. Yes I think that it is the best show EVER! Well aside from all the great things I have to say about it.. for some reason Mr. doesn't think it is as great.. I thought he would love it! Well, newsflash friends.. he doesn't. He has made many comments about my odd obcessions.. That I will so sadly bullet point..

• Sarah, really, again?
• Do you not love anything else?
• Do you realize you have FRIENDS on in 2 different rooms? (I cant help it that it is on TV too)
• Do we have to watch it again?
• When will you tire of this?
• We can not watch this today... :(
• Lets find something different you can watch.
• Are you really laughing?
• How many times have you seen this episode? Pathetic.

Well, I know this is a problem.. It was brought up at the last Parent visit.. "They" have decided that I should not subject anyone to watching one show over and over.. So, needless to say, I can not watch it everyday when hubs is home..
But when its just Sarah here........ Bring it on FRIENDS.. your old friend is back!

PS: Yes I can quote it.. Yes I have ALL board games of the show that nobody can beat me at.. and YES if they ever need me to fill in on a reunion show.. I GOT THIS

In other news.. there is a plastic dog turd in one of our dresser drawers.
Ahhh.. Marriage.

I thought I was a hoarder.. until....

All of my friends and family have accused me of being a hoarder.. I may save a lot of things/ garbage, but I like to save memories.. If you know me very well, you know that I STILL have my baby blanket.. Of course his name is Blankster, and yes I do still drag him around everywhere.. So before you start judging me you should know that I keep him (yes he's a boy) around for a reason.. He smells like my mom's house.. No matter where I go or live, it still smells like mommy's casa.. And we all know that no matter what your mom's house smells like.. You LOVE that smell... Also it keeps me warm.. ok it may have 4000 holes in it, but for some reason the holes are just extra places to put your arms or head through and not imperfections.... So, I take advantage of the extra breathing room.. Also, Blankster is so multifunctional.. He is my napkin, tissue, scarf, hat, robe, skirt, tube top, dog carrier.. etc.. I know you are envisioning all of these uses right now.. So therefore, I will give you a second to absorb all of that.................................................. Ok, so now you are jealous.. I am sorry.. But this 26 year old blanket is MINE.. bwahahahaha.... Anyways.. wow, not what I was trying to get to.. Guess I was just trying to get you to love Blankster.. or grossed out,. Either way.. I am thankful for my little friend..... Ok, so the real reason for this post.. I save a lot of stuff that people find to be weird.. But today I found my husband's weird drawer of crap.. He may not have a 26 year old tissue or a stack of school IDs from middle school, but he did have some true gems.. and these aren't in any order.. .... *clears throat*

• a black light
• An old stuffed tiger toy that I am sure is from the 4th of July carnival in Ripley
• A very old box of salt water taffy
• A broken candle holder
• Sunglasses
• Stickers
• A CD Walkman
• Some kid of animal horn
• Sweat bands
• a small soccer ball air freshener.. in case you are wondering.. doesn't smell anymore..
• and not last and certainly not least (I am just sick of listing things...) a fake dog turd.

FANTASTIC! So to sum this up.. I have met my soulmate!! We can hoard together.. His stuff will go great with my old recorder, glamour shot pictures, and of course blankster!! We can throw all the junk inside of the blanket and tie it to a stick... We will be like the coolest couple walking down the street during the apocalypse.. A blanket full of stuffed animals and black lights. Ahhh.. Marriage. The best thing since fake dog crap. Have a hoarderific day. 'Merica.

You know you are a wife when....

I am going to start this post and continually add stuff as I discover my transition from Sarah to Wifey Sarah.. Hopefully in a year when I look back on this.. I will have learned something about myself.. or have decided that medication may be the best choice for me. :) 

 

YOU KNOW YOU ARE A WIFE WHEN....

• You get a sharp pain in your chest.. you of course believe you are having a heart attack because of the amount of crap you just had to scrub from the toilet.. As you clutch your chest, the pain gets sharper.. After a minute of pain you realize the pain is not a heart attack, but a piece of a tortilla chip that had fallen in your sports bra from dinner... Sheww. close call.
• You automatically assume Shout needs to be used on every shirt and pair of underwear.
• You suddenly realize you no longer can sign up to be on the Bachelor.. uggg
• You wear read lipstick with your sweat pants, just because you wanna still feel a little attractive to yourself
• You judge every married couple you pass wondering if you are happier than them...
• You can easily tell your husband he doesn't read fast enough when you are sharing an article..
• Making dinner isn't a luxury its a requirement.
• You are notified of a dog turd... Aside from all other alternatives.
• "Umm you have a booger," is a normal daily conversation
• Bibbed overalls and a flannel is what he considers a, "Dress up outfit.." well okay maybe that is just hubs and mom's hubs.
• Okay.. last one leads me to,, holy crap have mom and I both found the same man with a 20 year age difference? They both love dumb jokes, both know more about the bible than us ( ok that's good) and both see no problem in a pair of dirty jeans and flannel shirt with a pocket.. The pocket for moms man holds his fork.. hubs pocket holds his cell.. Well at least its for half way normal reason.. lord have mercy.. we look alike and have the same taste in men.. I do love my dad and step dad.. oh holy father be with us.. We are twins.
  

  Enough said...









Hey Sarah, where is my.....?

Growing up with a little brother I somewhat have known what to expect by having a man in the house.. Jake was always depending on mom to do everything for him and wait on him hand n foot.. Well hubs doesn't expect me to do those things.. but I have taken it upon myself to do most things for him that I can.. I am always doing laundry, cleaning, and cleaning more after he gets home .;) He is very appreciative of the hard work I put in each day.. but I have figured out one thing that is getting on his nerves... I mentioned in an earlier post that I have some OCD.. I am not diagnosed, but the voices in my head that say to vacuum the floor 18 times a day has been able to persuade me that I have some issues.. Hubster wasn't aware of all these annoying lil things I do until I moved up here.. SURPRISE HUNNY, IMMA FREAKAZOID! :) Anyways.. sidetracked (shocking) This OCD causes me to get tired of seeing things in certain places everyday.. Therefore, I move these annoyances.. This is turn has caused a 24/7 scavenger hunt for hubs every day.. I guess I move everything everyday.. crappp.. I don't mean to.. but there is only so many times you can look at a rusty screwdriver on your new table runner.. shewwwww, I get stressed thinking about it..
So the new thing in our house is for me to constantly move stuff and for Justin to constantly look for its new location.. It usually ends with me saying.. sooo where was the last place it was.. he then points to the floor in the middle of the dining room.. hummm, I then smile, laugh in my head wondering why he seriously thought that those jeans were still in that place, and then I walk to the closet and find them nicely folded in the "jean spot." I have began calling him Hansel and Gretel.. he leaves a trail of clothes and tools behind him.. You will never find me looking for him that is for surrrre.. He makes it too easy...
Well.. I probably should go clean something... What is that hunny? What is it you are looking for? Oh... you cant find your toilet paper stash??? Hummm... now there is a head scratcher... *evil laugh*

She has Baggage

Every person beginning a new relationship begins realizing the baggage they are bringing to the table...Some of their crap is too much for some people to handle, while other stuff is just things you just have to get used to. Hubs didn't really have any kind of "baggage" per say.. Aside from his few annoying habits.. he came into this thing scott free.. Well.. wish I could say the same.... Seeeee.. I have some crazy maternal instincts.. I really need a little human to take care of to help release me of this.. but since I was older before I found my stud, I had to find a way for me to have something to baby without really having children.. Enter Jackson and Jasmine.. My fur babies. Jasmine happened after a really bad break up in college.. I knew I needed something to take care of and keep me company in my new found life.. She helped me through the tough times and was the best little thing I could have asked for.. Well on Jazzy's 5th birthday I thought it to be necessary that she get a good present.. I mean she had dealt with me for 5 years.. soo, instead of the normal beef cake and rawhides,,, I got her JAckson. haha. Well needless to say.. she would have much rather had the rawhides. But.. now they are besties, and I couldn't imagine life without both of them... However,... I bet Justin could. lol.
Having two dogs in the house has been the biggest adjustment for him.. they get a little rambunctious at times, have a mild odor, and like to play this game where they hide a turd so you find it when it has turned into rocks. I do believe he is getting more used to their little faces everyday.. but until they win his heart over like they did mine, we will just have a little more adjusting to do..

Men are Funny.

The Hubster is a one of a kind man....He is a door holder, compassionate, and sensitive about my feelings and his own. Sometimes I realize just how special he is when we go through our arguing days.. he always is the first to say he is sorry or to want to talk about stuff.. I would just sit in the corner and cry or use my infamous silent treatment trick (which is probably just a gift to him. ;) Either way I am very thankful for him....
 Once we got married I realized just how neat and prepared he is for things.. I have found his stockpiles.. He was a stock of batteries of all sizes, at least 50 cans of ravioli and spaghettios, at least 5 cases of bottled water, boxes and boxes of ammunition, and a plethora of toilet paper.. Now, I can guess what you are thinking......................... Talk about prepared or Finally, a place to go during the zombie apocalypse (which is why I think he started doing this) Either way it is nice to know we are somewhat prepared in case of emergencies.. HOWEVER.. as a woman, I of course have to gripe about it. LOL. bring on the bullet points Sarbear..

• Cans of ravioli? umm I pride myself of being a good cook. What if MTV cribs would show up here and check our stash.. We would so not be cool. Hmmm.. this reminds me, I need to put some caviar in the fridge (Is that where it goes?) Anywho, I guess I'll appreciate it someday.
• Batteries I do approve of.. This will come in handy for many things. Of course a person always needs batteries.. Especially when we have kids and buy some Barbie Dream House that has a working elevator.. Batteries are never included.. and I do not want to deprive my future daughter of a non-working elevator on Christmas morning.. Shoot, who am I kidding.. When I finally sprout kiddies, "Barbies" will be the fence  around the neighbors garden of robots.
• Bottled water.. hummm...another thing I can be excited about.. especially if there is ever a chemical spill in the water source of West Virginians.. (You will only get this is if you know about our awesome water companies around these parts..) Anyways.. gotta love a bottle of water. So kudos baby. 
• Ammunition? Well the only thing I know how to shoot is the Sh**. So guess those will come in handy for him more than me.. I could throw them at someone if things got tough..(I suck at sports though) but lemme tell you.. if we do have a zombie outbreak. We are super prepared.. (So if you are a robber and reading this.. keep away doll face.. we be packin' some heat up in this piece!)
• And my favorite of all TOILET PAPER!! This is the thing I am ready to get rid of so we can buy REAL toilet paper.. If you are a man, you know that you are gonna buy the cheapest tp out there. Men don't get how important it is to wipe with a nice plush paper.. However, in 5th grade I did a Science fair project on toilet paper,( I have a cool teacher mom) We called the project, "The Issue with Tissue" awesome huh?... Anyways we tested all the cheap and expensive butt papers to find the best one for your money.. We counted squares until we were blue in the face.. but in the end... we found out which one was best..... Wanna know? Is it killing you to know? Welllll... that was like forever ago.. so it is prob different now. butttttt......................................................................................................................... ...............Soft n Gentle.. Who would have thought.. Wow.. I totally got off subject. Okay.. To sum up. I use triple the amount of this stock pile paper in order to shrink the stash so I can get new stuff,, Soft tp.. Real tp... something to look forward to after you sit for a bit..

Okay, so after all that rambling.. I will sum it up, just in case you didn't wanna read all that crap.. Husband is prepared for EVERYTHING and my butt is raw. Have a Nice Day. :)

The infamous menu board

It will be fun while it lasts. :)

When I knew I was Taken.. ;)

Turns out.. I am a GOOD COOK!

During college, the last thing any student is doing is learning how to cook. We all just feast upon the horse crap food served in the mess halls and devour the "ramey noods" after cafeteria hours. After a few years of college I found my pallet beginning to be tired of the hard noodles with powdered flavoring and of course the cafeteria tacos that looked like a crime scene. I moved into my very own apartment and began the search of good food. I started watching the food network religiously, collected a plethora of cookbooks, and joined about every recipe website I could. I thought I was doing this to rid my mind of the previous years of slop, but after I really thought it out I figured out the REAL reason for my love of cooking.. TO BEGIN THE WIFE PREP! I guess I knew that a good wife was a good cook.. My mom was never really the house cook.. she worked her tail off all the time and didn't have time for all that boilin' and broilin'.. However, I have always wanted to be that old timey wife that did all the cookin', cleanin', and kid raisin'... WOW! That sounds terrible now that I think about it.. Either way,, I have really loved cooking for awhile. When the hubs and I got together he was really into my love of cooking.. He came from a great household with a mom that could cook ANYTHING!! She has all these secret cookbooks that you cant buy anymore and a binder full of secret family recipes that makes me salivate. Someday I hope she begins sharing with me.. until then, Ill just sneak into the kitchen when she's in bed and take pictures with my phone. haha. :) Anyways.. .She paved a hard path for me to follow. I am trying though friends..
Hubs made me a huge chalkboard to hang in the kitchen that I write the menu on for the week. I sit down every Sunday evening make out a menu list and grocery list. Then I do an inner drumroll and write it on the chalkboard.. I know what you are thinking.. PSYCHO! or That will last about 6 months.. well if you thought either thing, you are probably right.. but either way, it is fun for me to do now. I love the organization. I forgot to mention I have some serious OCD.. the board helps me to stay sane.. Oh shoot.. gotta go.. The board is hanging crooked..................*door slams*

Adjusting

Who knew that being married wasn't as easy as pie?? You look your whole life for this ONE person that you could see yourself with everyday.. then you get married and BAM.. honeymoon is over. Now it is the time to get everything we both need out of this marriage. We are both working very hard to adjust to this new time in our lives.. I would say my adjustment has been the worst. I have moved to a new town with no friends and no job. WOW.. I could easily go nutty up here.. I am trying so hard everyday to keep a smile on my shiny round face. I thought at first that the hardest part would be to play this wife roll.. all the cooking and cleaning is the easy part. But aside from all the gripes and tears this is what I want. FOREVER.. plus maybe some friends. ;)
So.. I think it is time for the goofy bullet points.. I have learned A LOT about myself in less than a month of marriage..

• I am a SNORER! Gosh I remember making fun of my friends for snoring at sleepovers.. Now here I am.. wearing my Breathe Right strips (husband insisted on this purchase.. ) with a hubs suffocating himself under pillows in order to sleep.
• I have a gas problem.. in order to keep that last smidgen of class I have, I will not go into detail about this.. However, since I have been married I could fart every 5 seconds.. but I have to hold them in. DANG IT! I shared too much.
• I kiss my dogs too much... Forgot to mention them.. I have two dogs that have been my fake children for the past 5 years.. Their adjustment period has been the worse. More about that later.
• I enjoy the smell of fabric softener and laundry detergenat. Is this what being old feels like??
• I make many weird faces at hubs.. he has figured out what each one means.. Who knew I was so transparent....?
• I watch a lot of stupid shows and movies.. This is according to him. I think my reality tv obsession and love of dumb dancing movies is totally normal.. ugg..

Okay well.. that's enough. I am sure I could put 50 more things.. but I wanna keep feeling okay about myself...

On to the next day.... Hopefully this GasX will work...

The Beginning...

Hello one and ALL! I am Sarah your new favorite blogger. You are welcome for sharing my life. No, it isn't because I may help you.. it is because I guarantee you a good laugh each day.. Maybe because I am funny or because I'm a moron that you may need to laugh at... Either way........... Welcome to my LIFE!! oops I mean OUR LIFE,. sheww that's hard to get used to......
The husband is a Supervisor for a Pharmaceutical company... I am a substitute teacher that isn't on the sub list... hummm do that math. What this means is that right now I am not working, but being this housewife that is keen on old school wifing duties. Ok, before this all begins.. there are a few things you should know about Sarah.. she is very well educated with a degree in Interior Design ( which is being used to decorate OUR house) and a degree in Elementary Education... so I already know what you are thinking.. her punctuation is terrible for a teacher.. you are RIGHT!! When I write or type I do it like I am talking.. so forgive me the of the dot dot dots..  and appreciate the lack of periods and commas.. I do that enough in my life.. So to continue. <-- see I can use a period. (In the wrong way).!?,.? Any whooooo.....
We live in a little town in West Virginia.. and before you ask.. No, I do not know where anything is or do I have friends here.. Soooo... to sum it up I am BORED!!! The hubs is great! He trys so hard to make everything great.. He is a very smart and talented man.. He paints, he is creative, and is more sensitive than a baby bunny... These are all the reasons why I married this man.. He is fantastic. I couldn't have ever asked for a sweeter more Godly man! Ok.. enough mushy stuff.. I LOVE HIM! Sorry couldn't help that. Forgive me.
Well.. I wanna tell you more.. but how could I catch you up on our life in a blog.. Let's see.... I took 100 speech classes and English classes (because we all know nothing transfers) My 50 teachers taught me bullet points of importance! So I got this... READY, SET, dot dot dot.

• We went to the same high school and graduated a year apart....
• I was never cool enough for him because of my band geekiness! <-- not a real word I guess. ) He was a jock. *cough* strap *cough* My bad. ;) Kidddding.
• I actually worked with his older sister at a local hotdog place... PS:I was called the Iron Chef of Slinging wieners.. (WOW. I thought this was cool.. hello naïve..) I was scared of her and tried so hard for her to think I was cool.. FAIL
• I PARTIED IN COLLEGE! Not really partied, but had too much fun to be a settled down broad.
• I started getting older... and all my friends were getting married and having babies. Sooo... I drank wine. hummm... Not always the best decision..
• So one day I had a terrible day of Student Teaching... Thought about quitting and bartending the rest of my life... I hit the floor and started PRAYINNNNGGGGG!! God please send me a man or person that can help me to grow up and comfort me in this time of need......... AND!!
• GOD ANSWERS PRAYERS PEOPLE!!!!! Justin called me almost immediately after my prayer.. ( We talked some on FB)
• This is when I knew.. this was the man God chose for me.
• We started dating March 2013..  Engaged September 2013.. Married December 2013..
• TRUE LOVE DOES HAPPEN PEOPLE!!!

Okay.. so here we are.. Married, in love, and ready to take on this new life.
I hope to use this outlet to put all of my ways to get through the hardest year of marriage. We GOT THIS! And it beginnnnnssss