The dreaded NAME CHANGE

In a perfect world, when you get married your name changes automatically. All of the paperwork is filled out for you.. and all government bows at the feet of the new Mrs. Well.. like I said.. perfect world. If I could go through my entire life without going to the DMV I would do it in a heartbeat. But before you even make it to the place where time stops.. there are 30 other hoops to jump through.. Take this here and get this from here and send it there with this.. blah blah blah. Once you get all the documents, a sense of accomplishment rushes over your body... cha ching! But now it is time for.......................................................................... the DMV.. the one place in the world where you could easily see yourself going to jail for life just to be able to blow that place up.. But regardless of the stink that places puts on your soul.. you are prepared.. you have all documents you need.. from every column and all stamped in the blood of a virgin. You wait in a line longer than that on to Noah's ark.. you are next! "Hi ma'am can I help you?" -says the grim reaper. "Yes, I need to get my name changed on my license, and have everything I am supposed to have." -grouchy Sarah.. "Ok great.. can I see your application?"-grim "Umm... application. dang, don't got that."-aggravated Sarah...  I am then handed this application and sent to the END OF THE LINE! Lord be with me... There was an older man behind me that had it all right.. " My lands aint it a mess how much crap ya gotta bring to dis place to be able to operate a darn car.. I got my birth certificate that is fallin apart a sperm sample a blood sample and my name on this shirt I got on.. So if they gimme any grief Imma gonna go get my dog  and make their day. "- perturbed elder.. He made my visit so much better.. what a funny guy. Anyways.. after another 45 minutes in line, I made it to the front. Turned in all my stuff.. got the worst picture taken of my life and hit the road. So to sum up.. Its a good thing I love my hubster, because the DMV is one place I would rather throw a grenade at then conduct business.
 -Mrs. Roark. :)

Ohhhhhooooohhhhh Listen to the Music.

Ahhhhh music.. the thing that makes the world go round.. the one language everyone can speak.. The connection between cultures.. and the one thing in a marriage that can make you wanna throw grouchy tantrums.. Ok.. so maybe you can answer this.. Who controls the radio? The person driving or the person whos car you are in? Sometimes they are not one in the same.. but everytime, it is a fight.
I loooove country music.. It has always held a small place in my heart.. I like the twang and the easily relatable lyrics.. and of course the guys in tight in jeans.. whoops. ;) I also went through a rap and r&b phase.. I still like some of the artists.. but I don't really listen as much as I did in college.. and then there is my hubster who despises my genres and likes all of the others...... Sometimes it is a true struggle for each of us to deal with the tunes.. He likes the metal.. it makes me wanna jump off of a bridge into boiling lava.. The other stuff isn't as bad.. but I can not HANDLE that yelling music.... I am sure someone that is reading this is getting heated about my pure hatred towards that noise (oopsy) I just cant handle it.. We went to an Iron Maiden and Megadeth concert this summer in Vegas.. he was stoked and I was miserable.. I guess you do anything for love.... However.. even though we have such differences in music.. I will still love him no matter what.. Sometimes in relationships you begin to conform to their likes of certain things.... Fat Chance on this one... But I love him and will cringe and smile every time his man finger touches the radio dial. Pump up the jam pump it up...

Husband is soo Talented..

Growing up I was a pretty creative kid.. I used to make these little clothespin people, "worry dolls." While most kids were playing sports and cheering etc.. I was sitting in the middle of my floor covered in glue, ribbon, clothespins, and of course fake hair. haha. I loved making those little things.. I gave them as gifts for many years.. As I got older.. I started painting, scrapbooking, and any kind of craft I could get my chubby little hands around. I was always the creative kid.. I wish I was more athletic, but the ability to even try was a challenge..
::: OFF SUBJECT::: I played softball for one season,, I was the biggest girl on the team, tall and thick, They begged me to play.. and well I did need to try something other than hot glueing hair to sticks.. So I gave er a try.. needless to say I was TERRIBLE.. our team wasn't that great and I sure didn't improve it any. I got to base one time.. This was because a girl hurt her ankle and I ran for her.. Well then I got out. lol. I caught 1 ball.. I felt like a rockstar. And the last game, I was last to bat.. bases loaded.. we needed 1 run to win. My father was the umpire.. and he struck me out. Awesome.. Ok so moral of this embarrassing story.. Sarah is athletically challenged.
:::BACK ON SUBJECT::: Crafting and Music was my outlet to express myself and succeed.. I guess that I suffered less injury that way.. except for my field commander elbow (for you Ellie) and the feeling that I have lost in my fingers from the hot glue. Anyways, in college I decided to go into Interior Design in order to keep up my art.. After that degree.. I realized.. I will just stick to crafts..
Okay.. so onto the reason why I am telling you all this stuff..... I have found the perfect man.. He is sooooooooo talented.. He has multiple art degrees and is the most talented painter that I know. I am so proud of him everyday for his diligence towards his talent... Being an artist is hard.. He had to get a job to support him.. but he truly loves painting everyday.
When you are in search of a mate.. you never can be sure you will have enough in common to make it last forever.. But I know we got this marriage thing .. I can watch him paint all day, sitting in the corner, with my fingers glued together. Happy crafting!

Check out his Etsy page..
Studs paint..

TV..

The best part about being single is the TOTAL control of your TV and inevitable ability to find the greatest shows known to (wo)man. Once you begin dating someone you try to like everything they like.. For a chick, we start watching the Barrett Jackson Car Auction, tons of endless sports crap, hunting shows, and in my mom's case , The Weather Channel. (don't ask.) Either way.. we start forfeiting our Dance Moms addiction to watch men think that their Matchbox car collection should be in a grownup version. I guess we all think that eventually we will grow to like these things.. Well, for a man, they DO NOT begin watching the things we love. They do not care who gets the rose, if there will be any fights on the Real World, who will win The Voice, which toddler will take the ultimate grand supreme, and of course what Hoda and Kathy Lee have to say about life. Talk about DOUBLE STANDARD! But guess what ladies........ when you get married.. You still care and they still don't! My hubster is pretty good about watching my shows.. on occasion he will do an overly exaggerated inhale and exhale.. usually this is my clue to turn it off of the food network.. however, other times, he will sit through the entire episode of Cupcake wars and even root on a contestant. LOL. These are the times I am excited to watch with him. Now, don't get me wrong.. He really has turned me on to a lot of shows I NEVER would have watched before.. Walking dead, numerous horror flicks, etc. But, I will still stand strong with my picks..
So, my advice.. LISTEN UP LADIES.. Get TIVO when you get married.. Otherwise, you will miss EVERY episode of Project Runway. You have been warned.

Crappin' is Happenin'

There are many times in your marriage that aren't as flashy and fantazmo as the others.. some of these times may be fighting (if that's what you do) others may be running errands as a couple (see previous post) and sometimes your sewage backs up.. CUE THE CRAPPY. When you get married you only see and look forward to the high points.. the date nights, babies, and of course the looooovvveeee... Well all this is great until you have a moment in which you have to turn totally vulnerable and potentially puke in front of the other.. this my friend is when you have a sewer problem..
Last night while doing laundry I noticed a weird/ dog smell coming from where I was standing.. Now unlike Justin I would say this had to be the dogs.. (he would blame me.. yikes tmi) However, I knew different. So I looked around and noticed an issue coming from the floor.. and yes.. this issue needed tissue.. well, it already had it. Barf. So... when hubs got home, I broke the crappy news. He began the 2 day stressing process. He did everything in his power to fix it.. and was even elbow deep in the.. umm.. well... us. I would never have been as strong.. In fact, I almost puked 45 times while being the flashlight holder.. Nevertheless.. IT SUCKED.. He had to use a vacation day,, YIPPEE for him. and I got to endure it all. Lucky Sar. So to do the daily sum up.. Sometimes marriage can be CRAPPY. Enjoy your toilets.

PS: Baracuda by Heart was playing on the radio during the worse of the sewer snaking.. soooo.. as anyone would do in a time like this, I made up a new version.. (if you don't know the song, Youtube it, i'ts a good song.. )   oooooooooooooo smells like poooooopyyyyyy...

Errands

Every person on the planet hates running errands.. Most of the time you have to stop 10 different places.. and are inconvienced at lease twice during the experience.. Well one thing I have learned from marriage is that sometimes it is better to just try to run the errands solo. Men HATE stopping here and there, dealing with people, and they NEVER have the correct things they need to make the trip successful.. Being new to this area I haven't a clue where ANYTHING is.. so running errands is like trying to find a 2 liter of Coke, on the first of the month, at Walmart.. It just doesn't work.. So I have to rely on hubs to take me around in order to accomplish things.. UGggggggg.. One time in my life I wish I did drugs. Sooooo stressful! Everyone hates going to the courthouse to pay taxes etc.. Mainly because you are giving more money to the government and well they are usually not the most pleasant people.. Well after a lot of huffing, puffing, stomping, and yelling, the courthouse experience ended with only a few of HIS tears shed.. ;) The grocery store is a great place for him to realize that ingredients cost more than lean cuisines.. Who would have thought???
Well to sum up, take care of your business when the other is away... this is turn will save your sanity, and you can sneak up to taco bell and cram a burrito down your throat without being judged... You're welcome.